It’s officially Valentine’s Day – 24 hours dedicated to love, affection and desperately swiping right across all dating apps in a last-minute attempt to find a date that can wine and dine your single ass for the night.
When getting lost in a haze of heart and cupid decorations, it’s easy to let bad habits slip by unnoticed until the date comes to an end. It doesn’t allow for much time to create a backup plan and fake emergency to get you out of there ASAP.
So while you’re getting glammed up and ready to go out for the night, make sure to keep one eye out for any of these nine red flags on your first date.
Putting an effort into appearance matters
Take note of the little things like whether they keep the area under their nails clean, if they managed to spray perfume before leaving the house, and just having an overall good sense of hygiene. Not saying that they need to look like they’re ready to walk the runway, but at least treat the date with a bit more effort than the grocery store run.
The love bombing starts too early
If they’re showing up at your front doorstep with a bouquet of flowers and a box of chocolates two hours after matching on Tinder – run. The excessive attention and admiration from your date can quickly become very toxic as they may see it as “buying affection” from the recipient to get what they want.
Take note of how they treat others around you
It’s entirely enough to judge a person’s entire character based on a single interaction they have with the waiting staff at a restaurant. No one is going to judge if you choose to walk out because your date has chosen to snap their fingers to get a server’s attention.
If you’ve been silent for most of the night, it’s time to leave
This is a first date and not a therapy session – you shouldn’t be sitting and listening to this person’s entire life story from childhood to coming of age before you’re asked a question about yourself. A date is supposed to have a two-sided conversation to actually be enjoyable.
Listen to how they talk about people in their lives
If their “crazy ex” or “toxic friends” continue to make their way into the conversation, the chances are likely that they’re actually the bad person in those scenarios. Who’s to say that if they’re talking badly about the people in their lives on a date, it doesn’t mean they won’t treat you the same way around other people.
They say controversial statements just for the sake of it
Bringing in politics too early on a first date is already a slippery step, but to start debating your views on top of that is a quick red flag. Especially if they are the type to argue topics with their “hot takes” just for the sake of being different.
They complain too much
The chair is too cold and uncomfortable, the food is bland, the music is loud, whatever thing that is new and that they seem to find worthy of complaining about every five minutes. A good date will pay attention to the other person above all and go home to complain about everything else to their friends later that night.
They keep checking their phones
What’s so important that you have to keep unlocking your phone to check and text back at every chance you get? It’s just rude and disrespectful to purposely not pay attention to the other person - your time is worth more than that.
Your instinct is telling you that something is wrong
Always, always, always trust your gut first and foremost. Feeling uncomfortable energy around you isn’t normal, and it is absolutely not something you should ignore. If every hair on your body is telling you to leave, then you better be out the door as soon as possible.
What are some of the red flags you look out for on a date? Let us know in the comments!
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